Texts!
by Scarlet Angelix
Summary: Ash added Leaf. Ash added Misty. Ash added Brock. Ash added Serena. Ash better get ready for a group chat! What if Ash was texting all his friends throughout his journeys? Chaos! Spamming! Shipping! [Made for fun. No serious feelings] [Contains several minor shippings]
1. Mirror

**Texts!**

 **Mirror Episode**

[Ash has started the chat]

[Ash added Misty]

[Ash added Brock]

[Ash added May]

[Ash added Serena]

[Ash added Max]

[Ash added Barry]

[Ash added Trip]

[Ash added Iris]

[Ash added Leaf]

[Ash added Cilan]

[Ash added Alain]

[Ash added Clemont]

[Ash added Bonnie]

[Ash added Dawn]

[Ash]: Hey guys!

[Trip]: Dafuq? It's one in the morning!

[Alain]: Haters gonna hate

[Misty]: If you do something as pointless as this again I WILL HIT YOU WITH MY MALLET!

[Ash]: If you can get to Kalos in three seconds.

[Ash]: Holy shit

[Alain]: What

[Brock]: What

[Iris]: Whats going on

[Alain]: Ash?

[Ash]: Holy fuck I just jumped off of Lumiose tower to save Pikachus ass.

[Iris]: You're such a little kid. Don't you have any pokemon that can save him

[Ash]: …

[Ash]: …

[Dawn]: Are you serious

[Dawn]: Wait.

[Dawn added Delia]

[Ash]: Holy-

[Delia]: ASH KETCHUM YOU JUMPED OFF A TOWER

[Ash]: Dawn I don't know why I get shipped with you.

[Misty]: Someone's learning

[Misty]: At least I'm not gay

[Ash]: What do you mean

[Trip]: Ash you always get shipped with Alain

[Alain]: What

[Cilan]: Oh my god…

[Trip]: Cilan you get shipped with Iris

[Cilan]: Wait wha-

[Iris]: Fak

[Bonnie]: Hey is anyone shipped with my brother :)

[Clemont]: Wait no-

[Trip]: Only one

[Bonnie]: Who?

[Brock]: Ash

[Clemont]: Holy-

[Brock]: And Bonnie you're shipped with Max. At least that's the most popular one. You get shipped with Ash sometimes

[Bonnie]: WHAT-

[Misty]: Ash you get shipped with Alain Serena me Dawn or Cynthia and Dianthe

[Ash]: Wait no what

[Serena]: (O-O)!

[Dawn]: (O/O) Uh…

[Alain]: Son of a bi-

[Ash]: … why Cynthia? She's older than me the same with Dianthe

[Alain]: No one knows… there's a butt load of lemon scenes too…

[Ash]: What's lemon

[Iris]: I'd say you're a little kid. But nope. We're not telling you.

[Ash]: *Searches google*

[Ash]: (O/O) ! WHAT?! THE FAK!

[Delia]: Ash no swearing!

[Ash]: Mom! I'm not a little kid!

[Delia]: How old are you?

[Ash]: … 10…

[May]: Hey who spammed my phone?! :(

[Barry]: Same here. I'll fine you!

[Max]: Hey guys.

[Bonnie]: Woah. Who are you guys?

[Ash]: My friends

[Trip]: Duh!

[Alain]: *Facepalm*

[Max]: So what are you doing right now Ash?

[Ash]: Just the usual. Trying not to die

[Clemont]: Holy shit! Where are you?!

[Ash]: In an alternate universe where I'm a chicken. I'll add them

[Ash added Alt. Ash]

[Ash added Alt. Serena]

[Ash added Alt. Clemont]

[Ash added Alt. Bonnie]

[Alt. Ash}: H-hey everybody…

[Alt. Serena]: Man up! You're so weak!

[Alt. Ash]: Sor… sorry

[Trip]: And they call me harsh

[Bonnie]: Holy Azelf! Is that _me_?!

[Alt. Bonnie]: I find this behaviour unacceptable

[Alt. Clemont]: Nothing a little magic can't fix!

[Bonnie]: I love these guys already.

[Clemont]: Bonnie NO

[Alt. Serena]: Man up you wimp

[Serena]: That's mean! I would never say that!

[Leaf]: Holy- Ash what are you doing NOW

[Ash]: Tryig nt tdi colt tpe (Trying not to die couldn't type)

[Brock]: What?

[Clemont]: Ash are you okay

[Serena]: Don't scare us

[Bonnie]: DON'T LEAVE USS

[Clemont]: No one's dying Bonnie!

[Ash]: This is Mirror Ash. SERENA HELP

[Alt. Ash]: Hey. Give me back my phone please? This is Ash. Where are you

[Ash]: Oh.

[Leaf]: I will never understand you even if I knew you for years

[Alt. Ash]; Oh come on Leaf! When I get back to Kanto you're dead!

[Ash]: C-can I have my phone back now?


	2. Hoopa

**Texts!**

 **Hoopa**

[Ash added Hoopa]

[Misty]: Who's that?

[Ash]: It's a legendary from Kalos. Lol

[May]: I swear to Arceus that you're a legendary magnet

[Hoopa]: Hey Ash-con!

[Ash]: WAIT a second Hoopa how can you type

[Clemont]: The future is now thanks t-

[Bonnie]: Holy Azelf your inventions never work

[Dawn]: Just like Brock's flirting

[Brock]: Hey!

[Clemont]: Not cool

[Ash]: Turns out that Hoopa loves donuts

[Serena]: I think she's over eating!

[Bonnie]: I think Hoopa's a boy!

[Hoopa]: I'm a boy!

[May]: You two eat like a Snorlax

[Iris]: If not a Munchlax

[Ash]: Not cool

[Clemont]: Don't steal my catchphrase

[Clemont]: ches chespin chespin pin

[Hoopa]: Sheesh I'm sorry for replacing your donut with a spicy berry

[Clemont]: CHESPIN PIN PIN CHES

[Ash]: Oh my Arceus Clemont WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU

[Bonnie]: SOMEONE HELP BIG BROTHER! CHESPINS MAD

[Clemont]: Bonnie chill. I'm back

[Alain]: Do I want to know what are you doing

[Trip]: Most likely not

[Ash]: Guys wait!

[Trip]: What

[Ash]: Someone's been posting our chats online!

[Max]: Holy-

[Ash]: And I think he's in the chatroom

[Cilan]: Not in good taste

[Ash]: Probing is right now…

[Ash]: WHOEVER YOU ARE GET OUT OF HERE

[Gary]: I don't think hes going to reply

[Hoopa]: You mortals are all the same

[Hoopa]: Except for you Ash-con :)

[Nixie]: Excuse you

[Alain]: HOLY- SHE's TALKING

[Nixie]: What do you think I am? Chopped liver?

[Ash]: …

[Ash has left the chat]

[Misty]: Oh no you don't

[Misty added Ash]

[May]: WHY on earth do you want to expose us

[Nixie]: It's fun.

[Misty changed Nixie's nickname to "CREEPY STALKER"]

[CREEPY STALKER]: Are you kidding me

[CREEPY STALKER cleared her nickname]

[Nixie]: I am a girl btw

[Trip]: Now I'm feeling really exposed…!

[Alain]: Excuse you

[Ash]: DIE BITCHES DIE

[Misty added Delia]

[Delia]: ASH KETCHUM LANGUAGE

[Ash]: SILENCE HUMAN

[Nixie]: … (-.-) !

[Delia]: What did you just call me young man?!

[Ash]: PUNY HUMAN

[Serena]: Brb

[Clemont] Brb

[Bonnie]: Brb

[Trip]: What is wrong with these people.

[Alain]: Some pokemon is attacking Kalos near me.

[Alain]: HOLY- ASH IS RAMPAGING

[Iris]: Waitttt whatttt

[Alain]: *sends Hoopa's voice message* " _BOOM" "ASH STOP THIS"_

[Alain]: Yeah

[Alain]: He is a legendary magnet

[Alain]: How is he still alive

[Misty]: You don't want to know bruh

[Serena]: This is Hoopa HELPPP

[Cilan]: Wat

[Barry]: If you die I'll fine you!

[Trip]: I have an idiot as my rival

[Gary]: Excuse YOU

[Trip]: GTH

[Alain]: Says ALL of you my Charizard will beat you in three seconds

[Gary]: Uh HUH

[Alain]: *sends video of his Mega Charizard X in full power*

[Trip]: Holy-

[Gary]: … fine you win

[Barry]: Will you three give it a rest

[Trip]: Nope

 **Meanwhile In the girls PM group**

[Misty]: Someone tell those three they need therapy

[May]: Agreed

[Dawn]: WTF is going on in Kalos

[Iris]: I don't want to know

[Iris]: Ash almost got himself killed while trying to save Victini

[Iris]: Thank Arceus that Victini saved his ass in space

[Misty]: Talk about first dumbest record about entering space without a spacesuit

[Dawn]: He is so screwed

[Dawn]: Like one time we almost got wiped from existence because of some lunatic wanted to kill Arceus

[Serena]: He didn't tell me that

[May]: YOU MET ARCEUS?! (O.O) !

[Dawn]: Yeah.

[Misty]: What were you doing when I was gone

[Brock]: Dating m'lady

[Serena]: HOLY-

[Misty has left the chat]

[Dawn has left the chat]

[Iris has left the chat]

[May has left the chat]

[Serena changed the group name to "Forever Alone Brock"]

[Serena has left the group]

[Brock]: Oh come on

 **Back to the group!**

[Serena]: We're okay!

[Clemont]: Hoopa can be scary when evil

[Dawn]: What on earth is going on there

[Ash]: What happened to me?

[Dawn]: …

[Misty]: …

[Iris]: …

[May]: …

[Max]: …

[Trip]: What

[Nixie]: Holy-

[Alain]: …

[Gary]:

[Leaf]: …

[Barry]: …

[Cilan]: …

[Brock]: …

[Ash]: What-

[Delia]: ASH KETCHUM YOU'RE GROUNDED

[Ash]: Wtf is going on?!


	3. Epic Fails

**Texts!**

 **Epic Fails**

 **Before**

[Ash]: Hey Serena

[Serena]: Yes, Ash?

[Ash]: Are you a keyboard? Because you're just my type ;)

[Serena]: Aww :D

 **Now**

[Ash]: If kisses are snowflakes, I'd send you a blizzard

[Serena]: *melting in real life* Thanks Ash!

 **Later**

[Ash]: It's been cold lately

[Serena]: You're right, it's kinda chilly. Braixen does like it one bit.

[Ash]: Bcause I want to use your thighs as earmuffs

[Misty]: HOLY-

[Cilan]: You do realise that you are talking in a group chat right?

[Dawn]: He didn't say that to me

[Serena]: (O / / / O)

[Iris]: Someone's moving out the dense zone

[Serena]: Seriously…

[Barry]: Ash did you copy that from online?

[Alain]: Looks like it

[Brock has joined the conversation]

[Brock]: Guys. This is Ash

[Brock]: Brock stole my pokegear

[Brock]: And he's using his cheesy pickup lines

[Brock]: That are really cheesy

[Brock]: And here I am trying not to lose in Kalos while saving Clemont's gym

[Ash]: HOLY-

[Brock]: Brock stop using my account

[Dawn]: This was unexpected

[Brock]: Everything he does is unexpected.

[Ash]: Agreed

[Clemont has joined the conversation]

[Clemont]: Guys…

[Clemont]: I have to tell you something

[Dawn]: What?

[Clemont]: There was an attack at Lumiose

[Clemont]: After the league. Ash lost to Alain

[Clemont]: Team Flare attacked

[Clemont]: Ash and Alain took a risk that would never end well

[Brock]: What happened

[Iris]: If he dies I'm going to… I don't know

[Paul]: Then who's using Ash's account now?!

[Brock]: Still me. I'm using two gears at once. Stole Ash's Kanto one in his house

[Clemont]: Team Flare has him

[Clemont]: Alain is missing and that's all we know

[Clemont]: Lumiose is dying

[Clemont]: We may not make it back alive

[Clemont]: Wish us luck

[Leaf]: …

[Iris]: …

[Cilan]: …

[Misty]: …

[Dawn]: …

[Brock]: …

[Trip]: …

[Gary]: …

[May]: …

[Max]: …

[Barry]: …

[Misty]: Author you'd better bring him back


End file.
